lessons learned

I didn't think I was nervous about moving but my stomach is telling me different.  It has been churning!  I guess this is part of the process.  I don't let my mind go there.  This week has been so many "last for a long time."  Last time to see my nieces.  Last time to speak at the church.  Last time to see the kids.  Last time...  You can only go there so many times.  I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings but if I let my emotions go I am afraid it will open the floodgates.  Most of the time I am on guard. I know when someone is going to cry and I put up my defenses.  It is when I am caught off guard that gets me.  Wednesday I went to my doctor who I have been seeing for years.  When she said good bye to me, she teared up.  I did not expect that.  I was like please don't do that to me.  I have learned that I was not a rich man materially. I was middle class.  Relationally I am wealthy.  God has given me some incredible family and friends.  The lesson learned is that life is made up of relationships not things.  We are currently repacking.  Taking more stuff out.  I don't want my life to defined by things.  I want it to be defined by those I love and those who love me.

Kevin's new adventure

The hardest part of beginning the new adventure is leaving family.  This Sunday I will attend Tyler's instillation service at New Life A/G in Bedford, Ky.  It is a privilege to get to go.  We were suppose to leave the country in January but was delayed.  All three of our children have gone through major life transitions in the last three months.  Cathy and I got to be a part of it.  It renews my trust in the sovereignty of God.  He is in control.  He knows what is best.  He is good and only does good.  It my belief in his sovereignty that gives me the courage to go.  God only has one will, a good, pleasing, and perfect will.  That is not only true for me but my family as well.  God calls us to sacrifice, to carry our cross.  It is part and sometimes central to the will of God but it is good.  It is for our eternal good. He does not have a good plan for me and a bad plan for my family.  And he does not have a bad plan for me and a good plan for others.  I will declare it again, He is good and only does good.  I must believe that to the core of my being.  I act on faith in the character of God.  God's character is the foundation of my new adventure.

lessons from my new adventure

We are just a few days away.  People ask how I am feeling.  My emotions are all over the place.  There is great excitement, sadness, apprehension, and numbness.  I don't think it has really set in yet.  Today I feel old.  I have always done things the old fashioned way.  I am learning to go paperless.  This is a stretch for me.  I like my notepad, checkbook, and paper calendar.  I am now learning to do everything electronically.  I must be the last class that never took a computer class.  I went to college for four years and never had a lesson on computers.  Everything I know is self learned and really limited.  I am been told that I need to become a computer person.  This is not natural to me but it is necessary.  To go on a new adventure you have to change, stretch, leave your comfort zone.  It is not easy, natural, or comfortable.  I am tired. My brain is on overload but I more forward.  I do not quit.  I laugh.  If computers are hard what about learning a second language?  New adventures require learning new things.  Putting away old wineskins, a willingness to change.